Joba Goes Nine (Steps)!  —  Yankee pitcher completes field sobriety test in video from DUI arrest  —  While devoid of Plaxicoesque bombast and vulgarity, the police video of Joba Chamberlain's DUI arrest is not without its amusing moments.  After a Nebraska State Patrol officer pulled …

Jim Thome's 8th-inning HR lifts White Sox over KC 4-2  —  CHICAGO — Jim Thome got to totally enjoy this opening-day home run.  —  Thome hit a three-run homer in the eighth inning, rallying the Chicago White Sox past the Kansas City Royals 4-2 Tuesday in a season opener delayed a day because of bad weather.

The Good Old Days  —  I watched 11 baseball games yesterday.  Folks, these are the good old days:  — During my chat, I got three inquiries as to what was wrong with Johan Santana, which is two more inquiries than hits Santana allowed while I was taking questions.

Hamels, Lincecum headline young pitchers at risk of Year After Effect … Mike Pelfrey was ready for me in the Mets spring training clubhouse, as if he knew I was coming.  —  “Look at me,” the Mets right-hander said one day last month.  “I'm a pretty big guy.”  Yes, sir.  Pelfrey is 6-foot-7.

Kennedy throws out first pitch  —  BOSTON — Massachusetts Sen. Edward Kennedy threw out the ceremonial first pitch at the Boston Red Sox season opener on Tuesday.  —  With fans cheering, Kennedy, diagnosed last May with a malignant brain tumor, walked across the first-base line and toward …

Toronto Blue Jays ban alcohol sales after fans throw debris  —  TORONTO — Beer and alcohol sales were banned at the Tigers-Blue Jays game Tuesday night, a day after their season opener was delayed when unruly fans littered the field with baseballs and debris.

YANKS' BIG-MONEY MEN MAKE POOR IMPRESSIONS  —  BALTIMORE — It was a full count and maybe with a pitch here CC Sabathia could still salvage a debut, still make Opening Day as a Yankee more than a humiliating entrance.  —  He had zoomed ahead of Luke Scott, a lefty hitter, 0-2.  The bases were loaded.

Baseball Writers Brace for the End  —  As Newspapers Cut Back, Press Boxes Grow Lonelier; How a Venerable Institution Lost Its Way  —  Baseball's independent press corps, once the most powerful in American sports, is fading.  As newspapers cut budgets and payrolls, the press boxes …

Mariners sign another closer  —  A look at Felix Hernandez, moments ago, obviously feeling good enough to teeter on his right leg — the one he injured last night.  He'll be fine.  Now for some interesting news.  —  The Mariners have signed onetime major league closer Jeff Zimmerman …

Giants' Sabean, Bochy on hot seat as season begins  —  For the Giants' 25-man roster, the proving ground of spring training has passed.  For Brian Sabean and Bruce Bochy, it's just beginning.  —  The Giants open the season today against the Milwaukee Brewers at AT&T Park …

Stan Kasten Sings a Hymn to Philly Fans  —  I'll probably always be something of an outsider in D.C., because I'm not from here.  I didn't live through Gibbs I or the Bandwagon, the Penguins in the '90s or Wes Unseld-as-GM.  Still, I think I'm getting to understand the mindset of that rarest of creatures: the all-D.C.-sports die-hard.

Note: No Game on TV from 6-7 pm on Saturday  —  FOX has an exclusive window for all Saturday games taking place prior to 7 pm, meaning only FOX and the local channel can broadcast during that window.  —  Meanwhile, the Marlins scheduled this Saturday's game against the Mets for 6 pm …

Minor-league teams set for season  —  The Yankees today sent out this release with their minor-league rosters.  Scranton gets started on Thursday, Trenton on Wednesday, Tampa on Thursday and Charleston on Thursday.  —  Minor League Baseball.com has stories, stats, rosters and schedules for ever team.

Answering Baseball's What-Ifs  —  You can learn a lot during a major league baseball game.  Like Ukrainian, if it is a particularly slow nine innings.  —  As for the science of baseball strategy, one game teaches precious little.  A well-timed sacrifice bunt can backfire and lose the game; a foolish steal can appear brilliant.

Marie Olbermann, 1929-2009  —  (Much of this post is based on a script written for tonight's television show)  —  My mother passed away Saturday night.  —  This remembrance is not going to be a medical history - though lord knows Mom was the world's foremost authority on her own health.

Will Unit be the last to reach 300 wins?  —  With five to go, Johnson far ahead of currently active pitchers  —  Every time someone is stalking or reaching 300 wins, the question is raised as to whether he will be the last of the breed — a contradictory exercise to say the least.